For you, Scrabulous!

This Facebook game is simply fabulous.
The players find it smooth and not sabulous.
And though bigwig Mattel,
Has entered the battle,
I don't think I'll give up playing Scrabulous!


Washingtonpost.com 06/04/08: RealNetworks , which has previously professed its supposedly neutral position in the copyright controversy over the popular Facebook application Scrabulous, is now sneaking itself into the mix: it is quietly introducing a version of Scrabble on Facebook, called " Scrabble by Mattel". Get the story here

An item girl, a reality show and personal sacrifice

"The outcome was a gross fabrication."
Miss Sawant complained in frustration.
"The rigging was a blow;
And to think, for this show,
I gave up my breast implantation!"



HT 25/12/07: Bollywood Item girl Rakhi Sawant today filed a criminal complaint against Star Plus channel alleging them of cheating after she lost in the finals of reality show Nach Baliye 3. Get the story here. Also, read about her sacrifice here. Surely, you can feel her pain now?

To the sexiest Asian woman

In 'Jism', she pouted her lips,
With 'beedi' she jiggled her hips
This hot, dusky gal,
Is a bombshell from Cal -
Well can you guess who? Of course, Bips!

:D

TOI 15/11/07: Bollywood actor Bipasha Basu has been named the Sexiest Asian Woman in the World 2007 by a leading London-based Asian newspaper. get the story here

O spammer, know thy consumer

Today my inbox has over 15spam mails on penis enlargement. Now this surely calls for a limerick, so here we go:

These spam mails are really ingen(io)us,
They promise enhancement of penis.
A perfect sales pitch,
Save one tiny hitch -
I haven't yet grown one - I'm Venus!

:D :D

Bovine feminism

"We girls want our very own game;"
Commanded a young Spanish dame.
"These bull are no fun,
We want cows to run,
They're gentler by far and more tame!"

Yahoo News 09/07/07: Women in the northern Spanish city of Pamplona, world-famous for its ferocious bull-running festival, are demanding their own version complete with cows instead of bulls. Get the story here

Singing in the park

The angry cop let out a bark;
"Hey, lower your voice in the park.
Here, folks aren't allowed
To sing out so loud -
And moreover you are no lark!"

But the judge said, "Well Am'rica teaches
That the people have right to their screeches.
In Afghanistan,
You could have a ban,
But out here his right it sure breaches!"


Yahoo news 04/07/07: Man acquitted for loud park singing. Get the story here

Announcing a limerick workshop in Kolkata, India

Finally, a limerick workshop!

If you enjoy Newsmericks and other limerick verses, then find your way to the Oxford Bookstore at 17 Park Street, Kolkata - 16, on 16th June, 6.30pm for the "Limermania" - a limerick workshop!

It is not essential to be a limerick writer to attend the workshop. However if you do enjoy penning them, you are most welcome to bring some of your work along, to share it at the workshop.

So be there for an evening of fun. And of course, you get to meet Inkspot :D

The Teletubby saga: Gay? You don't say!

"Dear Dipsy and Laa-Laa," wrote Po,
"From Poland we'll soon have to go.
Our dear Tinky Winky,
They suspect, is kinky,
For using a purse on the show!"

Both wrote back, "It's truly unkind,
The way they have Twinky maligned.
Now what can we say,
Seems humans today
Have nothing but sex on their mind!"

BBC News 28/05/07: A senior Polish official has ordered psychologists to investigate whether the popular BBC TV show Teletubbies promotes a homosexual lifestyle. Get the story here

Are we growing more and more paranoid by the day? Why do we have to read between the lines even where there are no lines to read between? For God's sake, even Freud had said, "Sometimes a cigar is only a cigar"!

Seriously, I think we are taking some things too far - and far too seriously.

On the occasion of National Limerick Day

A few days back, on 12th of May,
Was the National Limerick day.
Where - can you guess?
In the good ol' US!
And we had fun Newsmericks way!

In honor of the National Limerick Day celebrated in the US on May 12th, copy editor of TheTimes- Tribune.com, Ron Davis, posed some tough questions to Newsmericks. Read more about it here

:D

Bra-ism

I say burning those bras is a bold
Cry for freedom, but gals must be told,
That boobs hanging free,
May soon touch the knee,
As the gravity starts taking hold!

:D

In response to Madeleine's hilarious post:Keeping Abreast Of Bras

One kiss too many - II

Well the football game's referee was pissed,
So he whipped out a yellow card, hissed,
"If you think, that up here,
You can act like that Gere,
You are wrong - and I hate getting kissed!"

Yahoo news 23/04/07: A Brazilian defender was booked for kissing the referee during a weekend match. Read on...

Knight in the shining armour

Young Bachchan comes riding his horse
And carries off - Aishwariya of course!
And who is that hunk
All dressed like a monk?
It's Sallu Bhai, whispers our source!


DNA 19/04/07: MF’s horse rides into Abhi-Ash party. Read on

{pic courtesy DNA}

By invitation only!

"Hey lady, you can't go inside"
The burly guard at the gate cried.
"My orders, alas,
Say, 'only let pass
Those folks on the guest list of pride'!"

"Please, re-check the list," she replied,
The beautiful damsel, doe-eyed,
Then burst into tears
For you see, my dears
She happened to be - yes-the bride!

With such a lot of song and dance in the media about the 'real guest list', the secrecy and the craze for details from the Abi-Ash wedding that is underway, one can't but help imagine...what if...?

:-P

This get's my goat, really!

In Prague lived a proud billy goat,
Who one day to Sigmund Freud wrote:
Your id-ego claim,
You think got you fame?
Just come here and let's take a vote!


DNA 13/04/07: Prague residents say no to Freud statue, prefer a goat's instead! Read on

Eye candy

Around the globe, everyone blames
The menfolk for all those eye games
Did you ever doubt?
Well now truth is out -
That ogling is sport for the dames!

Sydney Morning Herald 16/04/07: Researchers have found women are worse oglers than men despite the widespread belief that they are less physically focused. Read on

One kiss too many

A self-proclaimed moral cop hissed,
"This Gere chap has left us real pissed.
He swooped like a vulture
And tarnished our culture,
Now all our dames want to be kissed!"

The Telegraph 17/04/07: Like the Shiv Sena, many Mumbai women aren’t glad that Richard Gere kissed Shilpa Shetty yesterday. They wish it were them getting the pecks. Read on

Don't know the story? Here is what happened

Family feud

"These in-laws are truly a pain"
A new bride was heard to complain.
"They always find flaw,
In their daughter in law,
And leap for her jugular vein!"


HT 09.04.07: Liz Hurley goes ballistic after criticism from in-laws. Read about it here

Related read: Just Married!

Tax planning

"Mr. taxman, don't be a fool"
A druglord yelled, losing his cool.
"Go Dutch, for God's sake,
Give drug run tax break,
And make it a tax saving tool!"


Yahoo News 27/03/07: In Arnhem, court gives tax break to drug runner. Read about it here

Needed desperately - a nurse

The old mayor pulled out his purse,
"Cash prize," he said, "I'll disburse,
If the woman you wed
(May she be good in bed)
Has the training to work as a nurse!"

Reuters 21/03/07: The mayor of a remote Bulgarian village has offered to pay 1000 levs ($680) to the first bachelor to marry a nurse who can bring some much-needed overnight medical expertise to his home town in the mountains. Read on.

Tch, tch, Mr. Ambassador!

Savoring life's steamy joys,
Nude he lay, with his sex toys.
Proves, though he be
A diplomat, see,
In the end, men will be boys!

:P

Yahoo News 12/03/07: Ambassador recalled for unbecoming behaviour. Israel has recalled its ambassador in El Salvador after he was found drunk and naked with sex toys lying nearby in the yard of his official residence, Israeli media reports said on Monday. Read about it here